Let’s Play OzWoz Bingo
Is it by coincidence or some supremely clever postmodern self-awareness on the Woz’s part that the OzWoz leg kicks off on April 1st – a date synonymous like no other with lame hoaxes, jaded pranks, and middling tomfoolery?
The forecast looks like the Newy comp crew will probably try to make the most of tomorrow’s and Friday’s turnable conditions, which means your servants at Ding Alley will tune in to the WozCast bright and early tomoz, to see how the first-of-four-connests comes out of the blocks.
Anticipating, however, that about twelve minutes into Heat One Round One, we’ll probably roll our eyes at some kind of commentary cliché déjà vu or what have you – and also for your entertainment – we’ve done up an OzWoz Bingo Card.
If you’ve got too much time on your hands, feel free to print it out and tick 'em off!
This particular card could be done and dusted in the Newy comp alone, or it could take all four comps to get through it.
If anyone wants to REALLY get into it, and can provide Wozcast heat timecodes to all 42, there’s a hundred bucks from Ding Alley in it for ya.
Comments
Spot on.
It potentially could all happen on the first day.
Love it Gra. Look forward to the analysis.
This is above and beyond. Never have I needed a printer so desperately in my life.
Gold
Does it get any better than this?
Cool, .we’ll stay and hang around with....Ding Alley!
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I've printed it and added some snakes and ladders........
My wife had to duck in and ask if I was ok. Choking on my toast and honey. So good.
The God one. Very true
Word from reliable local source is that Sal Fitz has already thrown 3 shaka's after tasting the Honey Soy linseed Acai bowl personally crafted by Sarah at BlueDoor Merewether.
cross that one off the list
Joe T said it was 'incredible'' to speak with Dimity Stoyle, so anothery to tick off
Fabulous DA - is Pottz commentating this leg? 'Pottz says "Wow!" in desperately overemphasized tone when nothing remotely remarkable has happened' would be another possible inclusion
How about 5 min of Ads when clicking on the link, only to get to the actual coverage, which then breaks for...you guessed it...an Ad
Ace Buchan 'Surgical' etc
Yep, they just dropped that one. Bingo!
just watched his heat, and that was pretty much it.
Surely there's a fair chance that Joe (or somebody on the team) will see this article?? This gives me great pleasure.
I forgot it was April 1st
I clicked on link in the WSL email proclaiming It's 5-6' and GOOD. The Rip Curl Newcastle Cup is Just Hours Away!
What slop!
Fucken excellent work Ding Alley!!!
Absolutely on the money!
The WOZ is just one big cheesy cliche at the best of times and you captured a fair chunk of it.
Haha this is brilliant. If only the waves were firing and I could be bothered to watch it all day. Id love to win a new toaster!
JT's superlatives on a day like today are just straight up lies. DA should offer a Roy and HG style alternative commentary.
"Building house" tho may be outdated.
Sal's shaka. Bless her.
Somehow it is okay in tennis to have silence during the point followed a bit of by commentary and analysis. Seems to work.
Would be nice occasionally for them to shut up for 10 seconds especially in really good waves.
Same in cricket frog...
In fact the abc radio cricket commentary teams have made an art form of amusing gap-filling banter in a sport where nothing happens for 5 days -
the parallels to much of pro-surfing are stark
but it seems there is a heavy undercurrent of sycophancy in the wozzle’s internal mechanics that results in never ending, breathless Pollyanna-isms from whoever’s close to a mic - meh...
But in fairness, I think if tennis players just sat down either side of the net for 5 minutes between EVERY point, it would be hard for any commentator to do well. There are challenges unique to surf commentary that we should take into account for sure. Not to say there isn't room for a great deal of improvement.