Can a pregnant girl go surfing?

simon329 started the topic in Thursday, 15 Sep 2011 at 10:34 am

Is it possible for my pregnant girlfriend to go surfing without unintentionally drowning the baby? How can the baby breathe if the vagina is under water? Should she keep her vagina above the water so the baby can breathe through it?

zenagain Thursday, 15 Sep 2011 at 12:20 pm

I'll field this one Simon if I may?

If your girlfriend is a little shy surfing with a snorkel protruding from her nether regions, may I suggest resorting to the umbilical cord which nature has so kindly provided her. You will find that along with nourishment, antibodies and assorted other goodies, oxygen will be delivered in a compact and timely fashion to your little tacker.

And if indeed you are the father of this little sprog, I truly do weep for the future of the human race.

waxer Thursday, 15 Sep 2011 at 10:41 pm

Zen, you said it all there mate. Nothing left to add.

lawsy Friday, 16 Sep 2011 at 12:40 am

Its common knowledge that dogs and pregnant women attract sharks.... Seriously, they come for miles when they smell a baby...

pensky Friday, 16 Sep 2011 at 03:36 am

Ha! This is hilarious. Come on - there is no way that's real. Simon is taking the piss for sure

thermalben Friday, 16 Sep 2011 at 03:41 am

You sure that's common knowledge lawsy?

lawsy Friday, 16 Sep 2011 at 04:01 am

What? That sharks eat babies... They are inherently lazy creatures that don't like to chew... Babies make the perfect treat for them and don't get stuck in their teeth...

thermalben Friday, 16 Sep 2011 at 04:33 am

Ah, thanks for clarifying that. I'll make sure the Rodney Fox Shark Museum is advised of these recent discoveries, so that they can update the wall placards.

freeride76 Friday, 16 Sep 2011 at 05:50 am

So Vic Hislop was right after all?

batfink Saturday, 17 Sep 2011 at 07:53 am

Welcome Simon. Hopefully they will upgrade the forums so they work as well as on realsurf, then we won't need to sustain Don's business model on our own.

I smell berliner.

simon329 Tuesday, 27 Sep 2011 at 10:19 am

rabble, rabble, rabble ... And if indeed you are the father of this little sprog, I truly do weep for the future of the human race.

By: "zenagain"

I may not be a genious on matters like this (thats why I asked the question) so rip on me all you like but you crossed the line when you condemn my unborn child and the little fella isn't even here yet to defend himself.

zenagain Tuesday, 27 Sep 2011 at 10:37 am

Simon, I don't really think you are the dunce that you portray. I think you are taking the piss, both now and in your previous posts.

However, giving you the benefit of the doubt, if indeed you are an expectant father, I wish you, your girlfriend and your newborn the very best in life and love.

And if I can give you a word of advice, money invested in your childs education will be the best money you ever spend.

goatboat Thursday, 29 Sep 2011 at 06:11 am

Probably wouldn't recommend surfing but I've heard that bodysurfing whilst pregnant is a truly awesome experience (extra flotation). No Joke.

casperthefrien… Sunday, 2 Oct 2011 at 06:36 am

Oh my, I haven't laughed so hard in a while! Belinda Baggs seems to be going okay.......I think its up to the individual, maybe 8 foot barrels are out but a nice slow break will go okay....

ricco Friday, 28 Oct 2011 at 09:25 am

No Simon, she must not.

A pregnant woman, or a menstruating woman shalt not stand upon a board in the sea - Leviticus

You see Simon, for it is Gods' will

timberskills Friday, 28 Oct 2011 at 09:34 am

bla bla bla!